It's Been a Long Time Coming . . .

          I've been writing poetry since I was old enough to understand how the words fit together. Granted, my work has matured with me, and I've watched it grow up with me and hold my hand through some of the roughest parts of my life. I didn't realize how much of an integral part of my life it was until my poetry professor asked me about a poem in my Spring 2014 portfolio. The prompt was to write about a secret, something we had never told anybody. I disregarded the prompt and decided to turn in a poem I had written the week before because I really liked it. It was titled, "This Is Not Simply an Apology, but a Confession," and I had written it one night as I looked back on the past month and realized how far away from God I had been drifting. It was just a cry from the depths of my soul for God to take control of my life again because I was so desperate to be close to Him again. When he read the poem in class he asked me how long the time was between the incident occurring and the writing of the poem. I told him that they happened at the same time. I knew there was something in my soul that was hurting, so I just started writing and it all fell into place; I wrote through my pain to get to the healing.
          As I went through the revising process for my final portfolio for my poetry class, I realized just how much God had used my poetry to speak not only to me, but through me. The words that I've put together into these works of art are not my own; they are divinely inspired. I know this because there is no way I could have come up with these. It's those times where I turn my mind off and let my heart cry out to God that I get my greatest poems. I also realized that these needed to be shared. When God is moving this powerfully through you, you need to share it with everyone you know. But please understand, this is not me bragging about my own talents. This is me humbly sharing with you something that God has given to me. I hope it will bring a joy or a peace or an understanding that will make it worth your while to read. 
          With all of this, I do have one or two disclaimers. There are two poems that seem to be out of place in this portfolio. The first is a poem called "Guilty Conscience of a Hibakusha" which is a poem about a woman who lost her daughter to an atomic bomb blast, and her story of how the atomic bomb has affected her both physically and emotionally with the loss of her daughter. As with anything that I write that doesn't have a "happy ending," this poem is meant to showcase the depths of the brokenness of our world. While the poem doesn't offer Christ as a hope to get through her pain, reality most certainly does. 
          The second poem that I'd like to speak about is the poem titled "Buzz and Crash." This poem really gets to a lot of issues that are prominent in our society, namely family issues, heartbreak and false love, and drug and alcohol addictions. It is another work that I hope will capture a small portion of the entirety of our brokenness and how we're all searching for the one thing that will make us feel whole or fix some deep-seated emotional pain that we've tried to repress. It's always the temptation of the writer to try to explain or justify their own works, but it is the prerogative of the reader to glean from it whatever he or she sees in the work that speaks to them. I'll let the work speak for itself, but I would love to get feedback from readers if anyone has a suggestion or a comment! All glory to the One who provides my every breath.
          Click here to access my Dropbox where you can read through the poems in this portfolio titled "Poetry Portfolio Spring 2014 Danielle Eschedor."

On Taking Scripture Out Of Context (And The Danger Therin)

Also, look for ideas that are repeated, and read both chapters.
The more you read, the more you know! Remember,
scripture is a part of our armor!

          If you were to open my tablet and look at the lock screen, you would see a picture of a sunrise outside my front door, and 1 Peter 5:6, "Humble yourself, then, before the Lord, and He will lift you up in His time," written across the picture. I fell in love with this verse in the middle of a lecture in my Spanish class that I wasn't exactly paying attention to . . . but that's beside the point. The point is that I recently went back to read the entire chapter of 1 Peter 5, and what I found totally blew my mind. You see, there are different types of books in the Bible. Some of them are simply accounts of history, some are beautiful poems, some are letters, and so on, but it's all the written word of God. 1 Peter 5 is a letter, written to the elders among believers who had been scattered due to persecution. In this letter he's encouraging the leaders to remain strong in their faith and to continue to be strong leaders for their people. If you've been reading my blog, you know that 1 Peter 5:7, "Cast all your anxieties on Him because He cares for you," is a verse that I hold very close to my heart on my journey through recovery from anxiety issues. What I never realized is that two of my favorite verses are literally right next to each other. I had to read the entire chapter to get the full effect of those verses and to be able to link them together! 
          So when you just read one verse and write it on your wall because it speaks to you, read the whole chapter first! It's not necessarily that you'll be interpreting that verse incorrectly, it's just that you might not be getting the full value of that book or section! The books of the Bible often address a certain issue and tell a story, and you need to read the whole story to get the entirety of the message! 
          However, you could be getting it completely wrong. The biggest example of this is when people quote Leviticus out of context. This is just something that is really present in today's world and right now we as Christians are standing on a global stage, being looked at under a microscope, so we need to be on our A-game. Christians (and non-Christians) who turn to Leviticus to either shame homosexuals or debunk Christians are not doing any good quoting that book out of context. The book of Leviticus is full of rules that, if followed, basically put people in a righteous place with God. He knew that He would be sending the perfect sacrifice in time, but the people who lived before Christ's coming needed rules and regulations to help them live lives that could be counted as righteous. They didn't have the Holy Spirit inside of them to guide them, so they needed to follow the rules set forth in the Old Testament to be counted as righteous in God's eyes, and also to be visibly set apart from the pagans and other people. 

          I could give example after example of Scripture that holds so much more meaning when read in context, or areas where quoting just one verse can be twisted to be used against God's glory instead of for it, but don't take my word for it. Today, I'm challenging anyone who reads this blog to take any one of their favorite verses and read the entire chapter. I promise you'll gain a better understanding of God's character and His love for the unique and wonderful person that He made you to be! :)

LOVELIKEVIOLENCE!

Stephanie and Stephen <3

          Hey y'all! I know it's been a while, but I want to introduce you all to the COOLEST Christian pop/rock band in the entire world. Lovelikeviolence was started in Canton, Ohio by husband and wife duo Stephen and Stephanie Spencer, joined by bassist Nate West and drummer Tony Saffell. Each member of this band brings something incredibly powerful to the stage, and no matter how shy you are (like myself), their energy is infectious. Lead vocalist Stephen and Stephanie have pure vocals that blend beautifully in a way that can only come from God, and they refuse to slow down during a set. They really do have such a clear passion for bringing the message of the gospel to people through their musical talents. 

Stephanie's AWESOME Conference Hair!

          When I first saw Stephanie and Lovelikeviolence at the Reach Conference this past fall, her hair was full of vibrant blues and purples that any teenage girl would die to be able to pull off, and I knew from the moment she walked on stage that I was going to be a fan of her music. Later that night, I posted an Instagram photo of bassist Nate West with a caption reading, "The cutest bassist I've ever seen ever <3," and a few hours later, he liked my photo. Needless to say, I died of embarrassment, but it was pretty darn cool.

"The picture" ... also featuring Tony!

          The next time I saw Lovelikeviolence was a lucky accident. I hadn't planned on going to the Rockin' Lockin hosted by Huntington United Church of Christ because of a vocal competition the next day, but my mom offered to buy me food if I went with her to help out, so of course I went! After an hour or so, I heard Stephanie's unmistakable voice coming from the sanctuary. My heart stopped and I ran right into their sound check. I slinked out of there before they could notice me, then started fangirling like a thirteen-year-old Justin Bieber fan.           After I built up the courage to sneak back into the sanctuary, I managed to get all four band members to sign my TOMS bag, and snagged front row seats to their concert. I was not disappointed. Nate totally brought the energy with his endless spinning and smiling, and drummer Tony Saffell definitely brought the bass. I've only ever seen a few people use a bass pedal so quickly, and I loved every second of it. Much to my disappointment, Stephanie's long locks had been toned down with their color stripped, but the show was still fantastic. I couldn't really hear anything my mother said to me on the car ride home, but I was pumped and filled with excitement to serve the Lord with my own talents. 
          I really hope to get to see them play more often, and I cannot wait for their new music that we've been hearing about on their social media! If you want to hear their current music (and trust me, you do!), head on over to iTunes, YouTube, Spotify, the Google Play Store, or their Facebook or Reverbnation page! Remember, it's all one word!

There Is More Than We See (Angels and Demons)

          Tonight, I had one of the most intense encounters with the unseen realm of angels and demons that I've ever had in my life. My best friend and I were sitting in his Jeep, having a really intense talk about God and the plans He has for us. It wasn't just broad-based, "Jesus has awesome plans for us" talk, it was us being accountable for each others' faults and speaking the truth in love to each other. Apparently, this was enough to peak Satan's interest and send something to check on us and freak me out. A demon came to my house tonight. For a 17-year-old girl. 
          I was sitting in the passenger side, facing my house, away from a patch of trees on the other side of our driveway, and as we were talking, I got this really sudden, really intense fear that something was behind me. You know that feeling when you're watching a scary movie and the killer is standing behind them but they don't know it? That's how scared I was. I tried to ignore it, because teenage girls get scared of the dark and scared of stupid things they shouldn't be scared of, but I could not shake this feeling. It was similar to the fear I had when our youth group did a walk-through of a simulated hell, and I got so overwhelmed that I started to cast out the fake demons in the name of Jesus. Tonight, I was so scared I couldn't force myself to say the words on my heart.
          I stopped my friend in the middle of his sentence and told him I was terrified. I told him that I was probably being paranoid and afraid of nothing, but that I couldn't shake it. I put my head on his shoulder and started to cry, and he started to pray over me. He was praising God for being our Victor, for being the Almighty God, and for the fact that anything that stands in our way or tries to cause us fear has to flee in the name of Christ. I can't make this stuff up guys. As quickly as that crippling fear came over me, it vanished. Whatever evil was watching me, it was gone.
          We talked about what had just happened once we were done wiping the tears from our eyes, and he told me that he had asked God for discernment to know if it was just a weird feeling or if there was something there, and God revealed to him that there was actually something evil near us. He said he felt my fear and saw something, in the way that humans usually see angels or demons. We don't usually get to see the details of them, because they're so overwhelming and terrifying that it would be unbearable for us to look at them. But as scary as angels and demons are, our God is bigger. 
          This is something a lot of people avoid talking about because when you really think about it, this stuff is scary. Really scary. In the words of my friend, "There's a reason the shepherds were afraid when they saw the angel of the Lord." God has an army of these things. An army of Cupids wouldn't really be that intimidating in battle. And demons are just angels who have chosen to follow Satan instead of God, so they're just as impressive, except they are pure evil, and knowing that should frighten you enough to keep you awake at night thinking about the big picture.
          The good news is that as believers, once you accept Christ into your heart, you accept His power into your life as well. You have the God of the universe dwelling inside your very body. If you tell a demon to leave your presence, it has to leave, by the power of Christ. So while they might be frightening, we don't have to fear them. Chances are, the first time you encounter a demon or an angel, you won't handle the situation very well. (Or maybe that's just me . . .) Don't be discouraged! Once you get a better feel for what your dealing with, or even just seeing someone else deal with it (like in my case), it will better prepare you for the next time something like that happens. Whatever you do, though, don't be deceived. The realm of angels and demons lays just beyond our vision. There is heavenly warfare all around you, all the time. Be on your guard, and never ignore a feeling if you know something isn't right. Pray for discernment, and if it's just paranoia, pray for peace. If it's something else, speak the name of the Lord. There is power in the name of the Lord.

The End of Timid Christianity

          A few nights ago, my parents I went out to dinner just to celebrate being alive (and maybe the fact that my brother wasn't home -- wrestlers' diets don't often include going out to dinner). We got to talking about the government and the way things are headed in America. We talked about the founding fathers of this country, and how they risked everything for what they believed in. If you haven't heard some of the quotes that come from that period of time, you are missing out on some of the richest history I've ever come across. Thomas Jefferson has been quoted as saying, "The Tree of Liberty must be watered from time to time with the blood of tyrants and patriots." He totally believed in his cause, and was willing to make the ultimate sacrifice to see it to completion. 

          Most people know the famous, "Give me liberty, or give me death," quote, but I bet you don't know the rest of it. While the entire speech wasn't recorded, the first few lines were. "Give me liberty, or give me death," is actually the end to this phrase: "Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it, Almighty God! I know not what course others may take; but as for me, give me liberty or give me death!" These were men who were walking the walk, not just talking the talk; their houses were burned, they were attacked by loyalists and British soldiers, their families were not safe. But they believed in their cause, and they were bold about it. 
          So what does this have to do with us as Christians? Well the founding fathers had a noble cause, but we have an even greater cause to be bold about. The thing is, today's Christians seem to be terrified of not being "politically correct," so they back away from the truth to try to go with the flow. Well let me tell you something, church. "The flow" is flowing in the exact opposite direction of Jesus Christ. The ideas of this world, the things it values, the things it permits, they are straight rebellion of God. Look at what wonderful role models we have! We have hundreds of martyrs who took a stand for Christ and did not back down even as they were being taken to slaughter! We have people who were locked in prisons for years upon years, but they continued to boldly claim the name of Christ. Fast forward to 2001 -- does anyone remember Rachel Scott? The 17-year-old girl, a girl who was the same age as me, looked her killer in the eye and did not deny her love for Christ.

          This is something that has been eating at me for weeks, and it's time the church decided to take a stand against this fear! Sin is sin, and we all have it. "Don't judge others because they sin differently than you." Right? That's what we're all about now, isn't it? We can't possibly tell someone that they have sin in their heart, because we're all sinners, so we have no room to judge. Come on church! Get real! We are called to speak the truth in love. We are not called to accept sin as commonplace when God has specifically called it out and said, "I will not tolerate this." But we don't want to ruin our friendship, we don't want to step on toes, we don't want to make anyone uncomfortable.
          Christianity is not about being comfortable. It is about being convicted and being forgiven. It is about grace that is applied to our very real and very deadly sin. Sin is not something to be taken lightly. The charges against us are not against our fellow man; the charges against us are against God -- the one and only true God who created the universe and is completely beyond our comprehension. We are sentenced to eternal death because of our sin. So take notes from the God-fearing examples we have in our Bibles, and stop being afraid to speak the truth to those around you! Their eternal lives are at risk, and you might be their last hope.

New Year's Resolution: Revive the Significance of the Word LOVE.

          I'm going to get right to the point here: you can't know how to love someone in a marriage-ready way until you know on a personal level the way that Christ loves his bride, the church -- namely, you. I can tell you this from very personal experience. If you read my first post, you know that I said I thought I was in love. Anyone who knows me and the man I dated would say that I was indeed in love with him, but I wasn't, because I didn't know what love was until I let Jesus Christ into my life.
          Love is such a powerful word, guys. Love is the image of a man being beaten until he couldn't stand. Love is having a crown made of thorns pounded onto his head. Love is being spat upon. Love is being mocked. Love is being asphyxiated by his own body weight while he had nails that had been pounded through both of his hands and his ankles that held him to a roughly hewn cross that rubbed his already bleeding flesh raw. Love is going through all of this even though He could have stopped it in an instant, because He needed to save us. So when you look into the eyes of your boyfriend or girlfriend or husband or wife or son or daughter or mother or father or grandma or grandpa or whoever you are saying I love you to, remember that. If you don't know, and believe, and whole-heartedly understand on a personal level that kind of love, then you don't know what love is. Do not be deceived, church. Jesus paid much too high a cost to show you that He loves you for you to be throwing that word around without regard for its significance.
          Here is a link to one professor's extremely detailed description of the way in which Jesus Christ died. Read it and let it affect you. Let it move you, let it motivate you to love Jesus deeper and let it change the way you view the words, "I love you."
          I challenge you to go to that link and read exactly what happened to Christ on the cross. It paints such a vivid picture in your mind. My heart is heavy thinking about what a price was paid for my life, but there is such joy in knowing that the price was paid willingly. He wanted to prove His love for us. There is no greater love, and pure love is nothing short of that. So find another way to communicate your feelings for people until you can truly say, "I love you."

A Letter From A Friend (Definitely Worth Reading!)

          I would be a fool to think that only I have wisdom to bestow upon my friends, family, and internet strangers. Although I haven't asked for permission to reveal his name in this post, I have to share it with you all because it is beautiful, simple truth. This is a text message I received from a friend I met a long time ago at my home church, who recently revealed himself to be unabashedly on fire for Christ:

          I don’t know about you, but I quite regularly get this lie stuck in my head. Its reasoning is as follows: I love God and I am never going to turn my back on him, so He really doesn’t need to reward me anymore; since I am already in the kingdom, my personal comforts don’t matter; it makes sense for Him to do miracles in front of and unto unbelievers because they have yet to be saved, but if I have a hurt or a need or desire, God doesn’t have to fulfill that to win me over because He already has me. THIS IS A LIE! God loves us unconditionally. Whether we curse Him or bless Him, believe in Him or not, live by His Spirit or not, His love for us is the same infinite love.

Hebrews 11:6 NIV

“And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.”

          I came across this passage last night. In order to please God with our faith, we have to be optimists, we have to believe He will bless us, we have to believe that God had a plan of prosperity for our lives, we have to believe that He is going to do miracles to us and through us because He loves us. The Lord God is ravished over you, He is so infatuated with you that He can’t help but bless you, He sees just how much of a treasure you are that He bought all the dirt your past buried you in just so He could have you. You are precious to Him no matter what you do or where you are in your walk with Him. Don't ever let the lies that have plagued me overcome you. You Savior conquered a death most gruesome to rescue you. He didn’t rescue you to leave you alone for the rest of your life, He rescued you to be with you always to the very end of this age.

Grace and Peace,

A Humble Servant of the Almighty

God, I just thank you so much that we were designed for fellowship. When two or more of your people gather, there Your spirit dwells. Thank you for moving through the people around me to encourage me and strengthen my faith, and I pray that I would have the chance and the boldness to do the same for them. Everything You create, everything You design is beautiful, and I couldn't be more in love with You, Jesus, Lover of my soul.

Amen.

Fluffly, Fakey Christianity - Is Lukewarm Christianity Even a Thing?

          When Jesus took up the cross, it was him saying to us, "Look, I love you more than I love myself. I am willing to go to any end to love you. I will die to show you my love." So when Luke 9:23 tells us that following Christ means taking up our cross daily, it doesn't mean put on your holier-than-thou attitude and try to do the right thing and don't forget to say "You're in my prayers," when something bad happens. I don't know who started this whole idea that Christianity is easy, but I'm going to take a wild guess and say that that person was related to the person that started the idea that being a Christian just requires attending Christmas Eve and Easter service and having a Jesus-endorsing bumper sticker on your car. Revelations addresses these types of people pretty harshly: "I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth." (Rev. 3:15-16) I don't know about you, but being spit out of the mouth of God doesn't sound very appealing to me.
          I'd venture to say that there is no such thing as lukewarm Christianity. That's a big statement to make, especially since we just established that it's possible to be lukewarm, so obviously it's a 'thing.' What I mean is this: if you're ambivalent about the Creator of the Universe, you obviously don't know Him. You see, if you truly know the Lord, you either hate him or love him. There is no in between. If a person can see what God has done for us and not love Him with a white-hot passion, they hate Him. Satan knows who God is. He knows everything Jesus has done for us. Still, he hates God. 
          If you claim to be a Christian, yet it has no effect on your life, you're not a lukewarm Christian. You're not a Christian at all. You don't know Christ, yet you claim His name. The word Christian literally means one who is of Christ. The Bible warns against judging others, but it also says that we need to speak the truth in love. I can say to you in all honesty that I have claimed the name of Christ without knowing Him. Before I let Christ change my life, I knowingly sinned against the God I had heard about, and I didn't care. Yet I called myself a Christian, I went to church, and I was generally nice to people. But that's not what being a Christian is about. I don't want this to seem as though I'm just ripping into people who aren't passionate about Christ, I just want people to wake up and see the truth that I've found.

          Get a mental picture of what carrying a literal cross looks like. If you've seen the movie Passion of the Christ, you have an idea. If not, here's a snippet from the part where the actor who played Jesus is carrying the cross. This is clearly just a movie, but this happened in real life. It was bloody, it was agonizing, and it was done out of love. Jesus had already been beaten at this point. Let that sink in. He had been flogged, he had the crown of thorns tearing into his head, and he was getting weak from blood loss. This is why He couldn't carry it alone. But after all of this, Jesus still stumbled up the road with the cross they were going to crucify him on. This is what true, passionate love looks like.
          So thankfully, we don't have to physically carry a cross and be crucified on it every day because that price has been paid, once and for all. What we do need to do as believers is to die to ourselves every day. I hear that so much and I think it's become part of that Christianese that confuses non-believers and glazes over the Word for believers. Dying to ourselves literally means denying ourselves the desires of our sinful nature. We literally kill them every day by refusing to put those desires over our desire to serve Christ. The things that we think we want, we refuse to indulge in. And it's not always just a battle against our actions, often times it's a battle against our thoughts and our hearts. It's not enough to just refrain from physically partaking in sinful actions, but we have to filter our thoughts and keep them focused on our task: spreading the good news of Jesus Christ, and leading a life as one who has been redeemed. 
          You don't have to carry your cross alone; Jesus couldn't carry his cross alone. His body gave out, and Simon had to help him. To truly carry our cross is a burdensome task. Reach out to someone you trust to help strengthen you, and you'll find yourself able to do the same for them. We are creatures made to interact with one another. To share in joys and sorrows, and to build each other up in our faith. Don't try to do this on your own.

"Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain." - 1 Corinthians 15:58

God, your people want more of you. You see their hearts and you see their struggle. You see that they don't want to let go of the things that tear them down. Show them how much greater You are. Let us be a people that boldly proclaims that You are far greater than any other. Let us take up our cross and make the decision to truly follow you every single day of our lives. The road to heaven is steep and tiresome, but You walk beside us every step of the way. Let us never become weary in doing Your will. This is my earnest prayer, that Your people would be on fire for you again, Lord. 

In Trusting Hope,
Amen.

(P.S. - The song "Courageous" by Casting Crowns totally goes with this post and is just an awesome song in general so you should listen to it! And it's right there. All you have to do is click. *sigh* Americans do love convenience.)

What's Mine Is Mine and You Can't Have It (Right?)

          I've said it a hundred times before, and I'll say it a thousand more: I write about things I go through to try to make sense of them. God and I communicate in so many different ways, music being the biggest and writing being a close second. So when I find myself saying out loud, "God, I'm struggling with this jealousy, and I need you to make it go away," I can so very clearly hear God say, "Write about it. Write it all down, so you don't forget how you're feeling and how to fix it." 
          So why am I feeling jealous? Because in my closed-minded, selfish world, I am the only one in my circle of friends who is allowed to have a blog dedicated to the wonderful things that Jesus Christ is doing in my life. So when one of my beautiful, talented, and God-fearing friends started a blog of her own, my jealousy flared up to a degree that disgusts me. How can I be jealous of her for doing what I'm doing? It's not me who runs this blog. It's Jesus Christ in me. It's Jesus Christ through my dear friend who runs her blog. She will touch lives that I will never reach. I will touch lives that she will never reach. There is no competition when it comes to the will of God. 

Mike Donehey of Tenth Avenue North

          A few weeks ago, I heard a podcast featuring the lead singer of the band Tenth Avenue North, Mike Donehey, speaking about how his prayer changed from Lord use me to Lord let me see You move. Let me explain: Mike talked about how every time their band would get ready to perform, they would pray and ask God to bless their set and to bring people to Him through them. It seems fine, right? He wanted to do the work of God and bring people to Jesus through his music. Then he realized how selfish he was being. What if God wanted to use the other bands at the concert? Were they allowed to bring people to Christ too? So Mike Donehey changed his prayer from God use me to Lord let me see You move. 
          Now I understand why I stumbled upon that podcast so many days ago. Because God knew the selfishness in my heart, and knew that I would need to remember those words. I want to see the work of the Lord done. I don't want to be the only one leading people to Christ. Those desires are sinful, and they are evil, and they distract me from the real purpose of this whole thing. Guys, I don't want you to remember my name. I want you to remember my words, because I am speaking truth about the only true living God. That's the point of all of this. That is the point of my life. The purpose of my life is to love God and to love all of you so that you can find the source of true love. God is crying out, through my words, through the words of THOUSANDS of others like me. He is desperately trying to get your attention to just tell you that He loves you. That he made you, and that he wants your heart. The God of the entire universe wants your heart. 
          So this one goes out to all of my friends who want to do the will of the Lord. It's not about you. It's not about me. It's not about leaving your mark on the world. It's about leading this broken and hurting world to a perfect and loving Savior. So if you find yourself in a situation like that, remember who sent you to send your message.
          Oh! And check out her blog! She's got a beautiful story to tell, and I wouldn't want you to miss it for the world. 

Just Your Average Christmas Post . . .

          Every Christian blogger, and most secular bloggers, feel some sense of duty to make a Christmas post around this time of year. This year, I want to put my own twist on the stereotypical Christmas post: I want to talk about the great faith of the wise men from the East. 
          Though the wise men only take up less than one chapter in one book, Matthew 2, their story has become common knowledge even to unbelievers. They came to where Jesus was born and they gave him weird presents like franken-sense and mirrrr. If you know a little bit more of the story, you know they were sent to find the baby Jesus by King Herod, who lied about why he wanted to find Him. King Herod told the wise men that he wanted to worship the baby, who was prophesied to become a King. In reality, King Herod was insecure, jealous, and arrogant; he wanted to find this tiny baby and kill him, because King Herod had no intentions of losing his power as King. (Shout out to my youth group and Jessica George from One80 in Sandusky for that one!) 
          Because it is completely contradictory to my nature to let small details go without correcting them, I have to fix a common misconception. Most people believe that the wise men visited Jesus on the night of his birth. I thought so too, until I read Matthew 2:11 a little more carefully. It says that they visited Jesus in a house rather than in a stable, where Jesus was born. Not critical to our understanding of the Gospel, but still. 
          Now that that's out of the way, let's get into the real meat and potatoes of this story. The wise men had every reason to believe and obey King Herod. These people took Kings verrrrry seriously -- they could be sentenced to death just for sneezing too loudly. So when King Herod told them to return to him when they found the baby, that's exactly what they were going to do. They were going to tell King Herod exactly where the baby was, and King Herod was going to kill Him. Instead, these wise men had a dream that told them not to return to Herod. 
          Let me tell you, if I did everything that my dreams told me to do, they would lock me up and throw me in a psych ward. But this was a different kind of dream. The wise men knew this dream was from God, and they listened to that dream. For that, I would dare to put them right up there with every other person in the Bible who risked their life for the will of God, because they were in very real danger of being killed by King Herod if he found out what they had done. 
          So often Satan whispers into our ear, telling us to sin, and we give in. When God is shouting at us, telling us to do the right thing, we pray about it to make sure it's really God. The story of the wise men is one of intense faith in the God of the universe; they didn't question Him, they just did as they were told. I dare you to let this story bolster your faith; when God is telling you to do something, don't question it! Listen, and obey!

Serial Killers and Christianity

"For heavens
sake catch me
before I kill more
I cannot control myself"

          Let me start this off by saying that this post wasn't easy to write. Any time you face a question about your faith, it's not easy. There are so many different elements to it: pride, guilt, theology, intention, justification. I'm not saying that I'm right on this. I'm saying that this is what I came up with, and I may change my mind on it at any minute.
          I love to write. I write poetry, I write for this blog, and lately, I've dabbled in short story writing. My current prospective major is psychology, particularly criminal psychology, so that shows you where some of my interests lie. When I write, I really enjoy exploring the psyche of criminals and writing about what they experience in their minds. My first legitimate short story is titled The Price of Being Human. It follows a day in the life of a man named Ezra Cain, who turns out to be not so normal, and does it in a way that showcases his humanity. 
          When I finished this story, I felt uneasy about it. I kept thinking about 1 Corinthians 10:31, "So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God," and Colossians 3:17, "And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." I had to keep asking myself if writing this was doing work for the glory of God. And right now, I think the answer is yes. While the story doesn't have a happy ending, it showcases the reality of the world we live in. If I ever decided to publish my story, there would be an addendum describing how this is reality, and that there is only one way to find true peace in such a world.
          With that, if you'd like to read a short story about a man named Ezra Cain, I'm going to refer you to my dropbox. If you enjoy the story, please let me know! Comment on this post or send me an email at Danisoccer1@gmail.com! I love constructive criticism, and who doesn't like hearing a "Good job!" every once in a while? Also, if you have an opinion about my take on my writing, let me know! I'm a big fan of healthy debate! God bless all of you, and please stay safe if the roads are getting snowy like they are up here in Ohio.

Mine and God's Mockingjay

          If you've seen the Hunger Games movies, you know exactly what a mockingjay is. If not, here's a teeny tiny summary: In the movies, mockingjays are quasi-parrots; they match their song to whatever you say or sing, and repeat it over and over. The first time mockingjays appear in the Hunger Games series, a little girl named Rue uses them to send a message to Katniss (the main character) letting her know that she's okay. Basically, mockingjays are just little messengers. 

          Last night, I was scrolling through tumblr and thinking and getting worried about a lot of things, and I scrolled past a post quoting 1 Peter 5:7, "Cast your anxiety on Him because he cares for you." That verse has been at the center of my journey out of anxiety problems, and for some reason, it really hit me hard last night. I find it truly amazing that if I stop and actually force myself to concentrate and literally give up the things that are troubling me, God always makes me smile. And a lot of the time He gives me physiological signs of His presence. That may sound so weird, but if it’s not a yawn in the middle of the day, it’s some goosebumps running in a pattern up my arm, or a little shiver on my shoulder…it’s mine and God’s mockingjays…whenever I feel it, I know everything is okay. Most of the time, I can’t help but giggle knowing that the King of the universe is sending me a mockingjay to let me know how close He is.
          Find your mockingjay. Find the way that God speaks directly to you, and cherish it. Know that the God that created everything you see; the God that created music and cats and ice cream; the God who breathed life into your body is talking to you, because He loves you. He loves you more than anyone has ever loved you, and He desperately wants you to know that.

"Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; He will never let the righteous be shaken." -Psalm 52:22

You are Jehovah-Jireh, our Provider, You are Jehovah-Rapha, our Healer, and You are Jehovah-Shalom, our Peace. Thank you so much for walking with us through life's struggles, and carrying us when we can't walk on our own. Thank you for coming down to meet us where we are, and lifting us far above the troubles of this world. You are our All in All, the only One we need, and we love you with all of our hearts.

Amen.

In Loving Memory of Those We've Lost 'Too Soon'

          When a child passes away, it's not easy for anyone. We have this expectation that people live their entire life, grow old, then die. That's the way it's supposed to be. So when that expectation isn't met, we get angry, we get confused, we get disappointed, and more people than not ask God, "Why? How could you do this? If you're such a good and mighty God, why would you let this child die?" This post is inspired by the death of a young boy who was very close to the family of my best friend, but this isn't the first time my family has dealt with the loss of a child. My uncle was born in May of 1971, and he died soon thereafter. I can't even imagine the grief of bringing a child into this world only to have him ripped away before being able to get to know him. A few years ago, some church friends of ours lost their 3-year-old grandson to an abusive boyfriend, and there are a thousand more stories like ours. 
          When we go through tough times in our lives, we turn to God and find comfort in knowing that He is our Comforter and our Healer. When we turn away from God and get angry at Him at the loss of a child, what we're really saying is, "This hurt is too big for you to heal, so just go away." That is a lie, and that is the enemy in your ear telling you that. You CAN be healed through the power of Christ, and you WILL find peace when you give it up to Him, but you're allowed to be sad. In John 11, Jesus hears about his friend Lazarus dying. When Jesus sees where they buried Lazarus, Jesus cried for the loss of his friend, even though he was about to raise him from the dead! So cry, and be sad, because you won't have that little bundle of joy around you anymore. But once you've cried all your tears, look to God and honestly trust that He has a purpose for your life, and that He will bring you through this. 
          As Americans, we tend to be people of action. We like to say, "How can this be prevented, or what can I do to remedy this?" As Christians, we need to ask some of the same questions, but keep the focus of what God wants us to do. When a family member who knows the Lord passes away, we can find hope in our grieving. We can confidently proclaim that to be absent from these bodies is to be in the presence of the Lord. That whole, "They're in a better place now," thing is true for us! If the Lord decided to call me home today, I wouldn't be complaining about it! That's where we belong. 
          When we don't know whether the child who died had accepted Christ, things get tricky. How old is a child before he can truly know God and accept Him? God wouldn't condemn an innocent child to hell, would He? Well none of us are born innocent. We are born of a wicked, sinful nature. But, our God is just, and we have to believe that with our whole hearts. Children have a special aspect of being completely trusting. If you've ever jokingly betrayed a child, and seen the aftermath, you know what I'm talking about. Because of that, Jesus says we need to have "faith like a child." (Luke 18:17)
          So what CAN we do about this? What is our call to action here? For me, it's perfectly clear that we need to tell them about Jesus Christ. Tell them now, and we won't have to question whether or not they're in heaven. Don't hold back from telling little children the good news of Jesus Christ because they're "too young to understand it." Matthew 19:14 explicitly says, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." So tell your children about Jesus Christ. Tell your friends' children about Jesus Christ. Tell your neighbor children about Jesus Christ, and most importantly, DO NOT BE ASHAMED OF THE GOSPEL OF JESUS CHRIST.
          Why would you worry about whether the neighbor lady is going to approve of you telling her kid about Jesus? Would you trade your friendship with her for the salvation of that little one? How do you know that she won't approve? Why are you ashamed of the Gospel?

"Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” " - Matthew 28:18-20

Surely, surely You are with us to the very end of the age. What a beautiful promise, God. What a beautiful God You are. There is truly none like you, and none above you. Jesus, do not let us turn away from You when tragedy strikes. Be near to your people while they grieve, just as our Father was near to You when Lazarus had died. Death no longer holds its sting on us because of what You did for us. Let us find comfort in your arms when life seems unbearable, and help us to never forget that You have a plan for our lives that is so much better than anyone could ever imagine. For no eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has imagine what God has planned for those who love Him. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. We will be comforted.

Amen.

The Very First Musical Monday! (ft. Phil Stacey)

Phil Stacey, or Joel Phillip Stacey, is a 36 year old Christian artist with a passion for missions, and an even bigger passion for God. I first met Phil at the 2013 REACH Conference in Cleveland, Ohio. Before the conference, I had no idea who he was, because I don't watch American Idol. Apparently, he was a big deal on the show, but I think he's even more of a big deal now. Although Phil didn't win American Idol, he did go on to sign a record deal singing country music, but God kept pulling his heart back to the church. He had grown up in the church, with both his father and grandfather serving as pastors, so he always had a passion for worshiping God with his voice. At REACH Conference, I got to see the side of him that many American Idol fans never got to see. 
          Right before Phil and his band got into Cleveland for the tour, they were all the way across the pond singing and playing for military families in England. Soon after REACH Conference, they left for Japan. To say that Phil loves to spread the news of Jesus Christ would be an understatement. He has dedicated his whole life to it, and he wouldn't have it any way. I was able to talk to he and his band mate personally about how he's been to the murder capitols of the world, and the fact that they've made a difference there, really sparked a passion for missions in me that I knew had always been there. He helped shape me decision to take a second look at Liberty University because of their mission-mindedness. 
          Aside from how amazing of a person he is, Phil's vocals and his ability to really let his music convey a bigger message is what makes him such an amazing artist. From his first big album, Phil Stacey, to his second album, Into The Light, you can see the range with which he's working. His self-titled album features his southern drawl that would make any country fan swoon, while his second album almost completely ditches his Kentucky accent and showcases his incredibly smooth tone. 
          Since he spends so much time overseas spreading the Word to other countries, there aren't many tracks available to listen to on iTunes or Spotify, but you can check him out on YouTube to see more covers and performances! If you have an opportunity to see Phil Stacey in concert, DO IT!

Phil Stacey signed my phone at REACH Conference!

Musical Mondays! (Maybe)

          Believe it or not, I'm a bit scatterbrained. By that, I mean that I often leave out important details and sometimes have trouble following through with things. With that, I completely left out one of my biggest passions when I wrote the post about myself! Music connects me with the whole world, and most importantly, music connects me with God in a very special way. Through no merit of my own, I have been gifted with a beautiful voice that I love to worship God with. Due to some long-lasting anxiety issues, my public performances have been few and far between,

but I am working daily toward a place that will enable me to change that. I would absolutely love to go into a career that would let me bring the good news of Christ to people through music, but if that's not God's plan for me, that's okay because God's plans are always better than mine!

          The purpose of this post is to inform you all that I might be starting a weekly post dedicated to Christian bands and artists! This was inspired by a youth conference I went to a few weeks ago, where the worship leader was the totally awesome, completely humble, and adorably hilarious Phil Stacey! He spoke at a couple of our breakaway groups, and hearing him talk about the Christian music industry was really insightful. He talked about how people can be drawn into the music without hearing the message of Christ, and how the artists themselves can lose sight of their faith when they get a taste of fame. 
          The only hang up on this weekly posting thing is that my schedule changes so frequently that sometimes I don't get a chance to write when I want to write, so it might end up being a bi-weekly thing, or everything might go as planned and there will be no purpose for this post. Either way, keep an eye out for my first article, dedicated to Phil Stacey himself! 

Phil Stacey performing an acoustic set

Let's Talk Forgiveness and People Who Don't Deserve It

          When I first learned about C.S. Lewis, I was amazed and inspired. Since that day, I'm continually inspired by the quotes I find all over the place that can be attributed to this man. When I got the idea for this post, I knew I needed some kind of visual to sum this all up, and I think this picture does that perfectly. 
          I want to tell you all a somewhat vague story about someone who has hurt my family and a lot of people I love. There is a person whom I will name Z for the sake of this story. Z has done awful things, all while claiming the name of Christ. Z has accused people I love of doing terrible things that I couldn't even say to you without crying. My mother was very close to Z, and loved this person as a sibling. When our family started learning about the awful things that Z was doing, we were all heartbroken, but my mother took it the hardest. 
          My mother is the most godly woman I have ever met. She is always the first to pick someone up if she sees them fall, she would offer up everything she had to help someone in need, and she is always the first to hand out godly advice like candy. She is not only one of only two people in our entire church who runs the soundboard on Sunday mornings, but she is also a dedicated Sunday School teacher and a member of the music committee and church choir, so she spends every Saturday morning at the church in meetings and choir practice after spending a very full work week running around and being a full-time mother. Everyone gets discouraged at some point, but my mother is like the energizer bunny. The list of my favorite things about my mom definitely includes the fact that she always wants to stay late after church and talk to everyone. My dad and my brother get annoyed at it sometimes, but I know that she puts a smile in the heart of everyone she talks to, and it's absolutely beautiful.
          Now that you have just an inkling of an idea of what a wonderful person my mother is, I hope it breaks your heart a little more knowing that Z completely walked out on their friendship, refused to answer her calls, and called her a liar and a traitor. I could deal with the things Z accused my family members and friends of doing, but seeing my mother cry with such hopelessness is what began a rage in me that I have never experienced before. This all happened before I gave my life to Christ, so I had no idea what to do with my anger. I took it out on myself. I felt like a failure for not being able to protect the woman who had protected me since I was conceived. 
          Once I gave my life to Christ, I had to look at this situation in a different light. I thought I had forgiven Z by refusing to think about them, but last night I saw Z again for the first time in a long time. Instantly, I had thought after thought firing through my head, and they were mean, vengeful thoughts. I knew I had to forgive Z in a way that actually meant letting go of these thoughts, but I just didn't want to. Writing always helps clear my head, so I dug into the Word to try to find the perfect verse to support the argument for forgiveness. 
          Colossians 3:13 reads, "Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you." For me, this really put things into perspective. The whole chapter is talking about living in a way that is pleasing to God, and how we can strive to be more like God, and that last sentence hits it home: Forgive as the Lord forgave you. Each of us needs to realize that at one point in our lives, we were as vile a creature as our worst enemy. We hated God, we did things that directly defied Him, we accused Him of being the source of all of our problems. None of us deserves forgiveness: We've all fallen short. 
          So as Christians, we walk around claiming the name of Christ, boasting in His mercy and grace, claiming to be striving toward Christ-likeness, then we turn around and harbor all of this anger and resentment toward those who've done no worse than we've done to God! Forgiveness means letting go of pain, and pain can become a place to hide. You can stand in all of your pain and say, "I don't have to acknowledge my faults! Look what he's done to me! Look what she did to them! Pay attention to their shortcomings; don't look at mine! I'm the victim!" 
          Where would you be today if God had hidden in His pain instead of forgiving you?

Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. - Psalm 139:23-24

God, I just need to thank you for the forgiveness I've been given. I would be dead right now if you didn't love me. I pray for strength to love Z in the way that you love me, and to be emptied of my pride and my pain. For everyone who's struggling with forgiveness, I pray for them to know the peace that comes with letting go of that anger. You are the Mighty God, the One capable of so much more than we could ever imagine, and we want to spend our whole lives praising You for what You've done. Thank you so, so very much.

In the name of the only One who is mighty to save,
Amen. 

When the Going Gets Tough, the Tough Get Down On Their Knees.

          Let me tell you, you take one step in the right direction and the devil is going to knock you off your feet. But look where you are; you are in perfect battle position on your knees. Exodus 14:14 reads, "The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still." The thing I always stress in my Bible studies is don't just read the sentence. You've read it a hundred times, you can recite it to anyone you meet, but you still don't let it affect you. What does it actually look like to let the Lord fight for you?
          None of us are strangers to trouble. It's been my experience that as Christians, the more we try to be like Christ and do things to advance His kingdom, the more trouble we're going to find ourselves facing. 2 Timothy 3:12 seems to agree with me. Sometimes it can feel like you just want to look up at God and say, "Are you serious? You ask me to follow you, and I do, and this is what I get?" Whenever I find myself talking to God like this, I get this mental image of God doing the 'Should've had a V8' head-bonk to me. Because time and time again, Jesus looks at us when we're struggling and his heart just breaks because all we have to do is let go. You see, the troubles we face in this world can feel completely overwhelming. Bills need to be paid, schoolwork has to get done, people turn against us, plans we thought were what God wanted for us fall through, and we're always left frustrated and confused. 
          I have known way too many white-knuckle Christians. What I mean by that is that when these troubles come at them, they try to take matters into their own hands and say, "I can beat this. I can push through and win this battle." So they spend every waking second of their lives fighting and fighting, and the problems might fade away for a bit, but they never truly go away. If you are trying to beat something on your own, you will spend all of your time trying to beat that thing, and you will be rendered ineffective for the Kingdom of God. So the enemy wins that battle! But here's your other option: let go, and let God work. Letting go of whatever problems you're facing does not mean ignoring them. It means looking them dead in the eye and saying, "My God is so much bigger than you." You acknowledge that there is a problem, that it's bringing you pain, and that God is going to bring you through it. 
          I'm not here to tell you that this is the easiest thing in the world and it will completely fix your life and you'll never ever feel stressed ever again. Trusting in God to handle things that seem completely out of control isn't always easy. But luckily for us, we have the most trustworthy entity to ever exist on our side. Our God is all-powerful. Not only does He have the power to change any situation, He's already got our entire lives figured out for us. How seriously cool is that? Every single trouble we go through was designed for a greater purpose. Repeat that to yourself out loud: Every single trouble I go through was designed for a greater purpose. Yes! That purpose might not be revealed to you as soon as you get out of it, but if you truly believe in the goodness and fairness of God, you'll be able to see that ways God has used seemingly awful situations to bring glory to His name. 
          Now as far as being on your knees is concerned, I want to show you one of my personal favorite passages of the Bible. In Luke 22:39-46, Jesus is in the final hours of his free life. He knew He was soon to be betrayed, and Jesus was freaking out. He goes off by himself, gets down on his knees and says, "Father, if there's any way you can stop this from happening, please do it. BUT, if it's Your will, I won't refuse You." That whole passage is such a beautiful model for how we can pray when we're going through some of the roughest times in our lives. We can cry out to God and ask him to take away this thing that we're struggling through, but we have to accept that there are things we have to go through to get to where God wants us to be. And one of the most sincere ways to ask God to move is on our knees. Kneeling before the Lord is a sign of true surrender. You're saying, "I don't even have the strength to stand on my own, I need You in every single aspect of my life, God." It's a sign of respect and submission. When you're on your knees, you give up control. When you give up control, you let God fight for you -- and our God never loses. 

"Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify You." -Psalm 63:3

God I thank you so much for loving us so fiercely, so jealously, that when the enemy sunk his teeth into us, You sacrificed your own Son to free us from his grip. That same jealous love is the love with which you hold us safely above the fray when everything seems to be falling apart. I pray that someone would read this and just let go of whatever is holding them back from doing amazing things for Your Kingdom and let You, the Creator and Master of all things, fight for them. Thank you so much. I love you.

In Jesus' mighty name,
Amen.